Engaging Your Network
"You schmooze, you lose”
Confession: I generally hate networking.
That confession surprises some, since I have a job that interfaces with people (both internal and external stakeholders) all the time, and is predicated on building relationships. My friends would probably describe me as an extrovert, but ugh.cringe.shudder, the idea of interjecting myself into a situation or conversation where I need to “sell myself” is basically my worst nightmare.
Perhaps my aversion to networking was caused by a series of overwhelming experiences at conferences. I’ve been to some of the larger industry conferences for asset based lending, fintech and private capital, with thousands of attendees running around spraying around business cards.. and it has been traumatizing. In between information sessions, there are time blocks for speed networking (like adult recess), and sometimes (inexplicably), a quasi-famous hip hop star or rock band will play a concert to a lukewarm crowd. (Sorry, Flo Rida). It’s all very over the top and not very enjoyable, and in most of those scenarios, I literally count down the minutes until I can retreat to my hotel room.
Unfortunately, in some ways, networking is unavoidable. As an early grad you need to pitch yourself for first jobs. In mid-career building, you need to start relationships that help you advance. In senior career stages - even in the most “introverted” of disciplines (e.g. design, writing etc.) - in order to grow your business, you need to build a network.
I historically viewed networking as a chore and a means to an end. In order to get something, I needed to network. But my biggest revelation on networking came to me by shifting the order of operations:
Old way: Meet interesting person —> identify where they can be helpful —> ask for favour
New way: Meet interesting person —> learn what makes them tick —> share what you’re working on —> see what comes back
In short, make a genuine connection vs. a transaction.
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